LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread

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LeftfootlegendGooner
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Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread

Postby LeftfootlegendGooner » Thu Dec 07, 2017 7:25 pm

The wife is the only one I've ever been with.

The rest were all 7's or higher.

LeftfootlegendGooner
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Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread

Postby LeftfootlegendGooner » Thu Dec 07, 2017 7:28 pm

Teach a man to fish and he will eat for a lifetime. Teach a feminist to fish and she will accuse you of patronising her, claim she knew how to do it anyway and that even if she didn't, she could easily work it out without the help of a man.

LeftfootlegendGooner
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Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread

Postby LeftfootlegendGooner » Thu Dec 07, 2017 7:29 pm

It's only my second day in prison, and I've already been brutally bummed in the showers three times.

I'm starting to think maybe I'm not cut out to be a guard.

LeftfootlegendGooner
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Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread

Postby LeftfootlegendGooner » Thu Dec 07, 2017 7:30 pm

As the doctor went through my notes, he said, "The surgery has risks. You will almost certainly regain the sight in your eyes but there is a chance it will affect your ability to maintain an erection." I said, "How come?"

He said, "Well ... your wife is very ugly."

LeftfootlegendGooner
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Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread

Postby LeftfootlegendGooner » Thu Dec 07, 2017 7:32 pm

Durex have made a new condom with anaesthetic on the inside so you can last longer. I like to wear it inside out so I don't have to wake anyone up.

LeftfootlegendGooner
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Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread

Postby LeftfootlegendGooner » Thu Dec 07, 2017 8:59 pm

I know its a day early but that's all for now, hope at least 3 people see it lol :barscarf:

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GranadaJoe
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Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread

Postby GranadaJoe » Thu Dec 07, 2017 10:03 pm

Top work.

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StuartL
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Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread

Postby StuartL » Thu Dec 07, 2017 10:38 pm

I know its a day early but that's all for now, hope at least 3 people see it lol :barscarf:
I don’t get that last one ?

Good stuff Lefty

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DB10GOONER
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Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread

Postby DB10GOONER » Fri Dec 08, 2017 8:07 am

It's only my second day in prison, and I've already been brutally bummed in the showers three times.

I'm starting to think maybe I'm not cut out to be a guard.
:lol: :lol: :lol:

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DB10GOONER
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Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread

Postby DB10GOONER » Fri Dec 08, 2017 8:08 am

I know its a day early but that's all for now, hope at least 3 people see it lol :barscarf:
Top work, Lefty. :lol: 8)

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OneBardGooner
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Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread

Postby OneBardGooner » Fri Dec 08, 2017 9:19 am

I know its a day early but that's all for now, hope at least 3 people see it lol :barscarf:
make that Four! :barscarf: :wink:

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OneBardGooner
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Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread

Postby OneBardGooner » Fri Dec 08, 2017 9:23 am

Seriously LFG I had to stop reading them - I was laughing so much my manager looked across the office to see why?

:lol: :barscarf:

Top Work Indeed Mate! :cheers:

LeftfootlegendGooner
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Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread

Postby LeftfootlegendGooner » Fri Dec 08, 2017 9:35 am

Seriously LFG I had to stop reading them - I was laughing so much my manager looked across the office to see why?

:lol: :barscarf:

Top Work Indeed Mate! :cheers:
:lol:

Worth the work then :barscarf:

LeftfootlegendGooner
Posts: 6678
Joined: Fri Jan 09, 2009 1:07 pm

Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread

Postby LeftfootlegendGooner » Fri Dec 08, 2017 9:36 am

I know its a day early but that's all for now, hope at least 3 people see it lol :barscarf:
Top work, Lefty. :lol: 8)
Cheers dude 8)

LeftfootlegendGooner
Posts: 6678
Joined: Fri Jan 09, 2009 1:07 pm

Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread

Postby LeftfootlegendGooner » Fri Dec 08, 2017 9:37 am

I know its a day early but that's all for now, hope at least 3 people see it lol :barscarf:
I don’t get that last one ?

Good stuff Lefty
Cheers Stu :barscarf:


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