Up with the lark

It's all a load of Cannonballs in here! This is the virtual Arsenal pub where you can chat about anything except football. Be warned though, like any pub, the content may not always be suitable for everyone.
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Rugby Gooner
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Re: Up with the lark

Post by Rugby Gooner »

Brightonnxtround wrote::corkbarry: why the fuck did I do that , seemed like a good idea at the time
Misses got frisky had a little bit but couldn't pull the cork :D
That happens when ya get to my age Up the reds :barscarf:
How's your head mate? Happy Birthday for yesterday

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Brightonnxtround
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Re: Up with the lark

Post by Brightonnxtround »

Rugby Gooner wrote:
Brightonnxtround wrote::corkbarry: why the fuck did I do that , seemed like a good idea at the time
Misses got frisky had a little bit but couldn't pull the cork :D
That happens when ya get to my age Up the reds :barscarf:
How's your head mate? Happy Birthday for yesterday
Stinging mate mouth as dry as a chickens ars . On the water all day today

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Rugby Gooner
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Re: Up with the lark

Post by Rugby Gooner »

Brightonnxtround wrote:
Rugby Gooner wrote:
Brightonnxtround wrote::corkbarry: why the fuck did I do that , seemed like a good idea at the time
Misses got frisky had a little bit but couldn't pull the cork :D
That happens when ya get to my age Up the reds :barscarf:
How's your head mate? Happy Birthday for yesterday
Stinging mate mouth as dry as a chickens ars . On the water all day today
Stick a double single malt in with some of that water mate,that'll sort you out :D :barscarf:

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Brightonnxtround
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Re: Up with the lark

Post by Brightonnxtround »

I see that we almost ended up in seventh only goal difference keeps us sixth and this year the scum will definitely finish second, plenty of stick down pub but you know what as we keep failing it becomes easier to take UP THE REDS :barscarf:

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DB10GOONER
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Re: Up with the lark

Post by DB10GOONER »

Brightonnxtround wrote: :corkbarry: why the fuck did I do that , seemed like a good idea at the time
Misses got frisky had a little bit but couldn't pull the cork :D
That happens when ya get to my age Up the reds :barscarf:
:lol: :lol: :lol:

Happy belated birthday, mate! :barscarf:

For future reference when fucked by the hangover, try my patented "Cure or Kill" remedy;

1. Place one can of beer in the freezer for about 20 to 30 minutes (this depends on your freezer) basically you want the beer freezing fucking ice cold but not quite Slush Puppy frozen.

2. Neck said can in at most 4 or 5 big fuck off sized gulps.

3. Post your thanks to me on here.

Instant cure. Works every time for me. 8) 8)

Disclaimer: this only works if you can keep it in. If you puke it up you will be fucked for the day. :lol: :wink:

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Brightonnxtround
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Re: Up with the lark

Post by Brightonnxtround »

DB10GOONER wrote:
Brightonnxtround wrote: :corkbarry: why the fuck did I do that , seemed like a good idea at the time
Misses got frisky had a little bit but couldn't pull the cork :D
That happens when ya get to my age Up the reds :barscarf:
:lol: :lol: :lol:

Happy belated birthday, mate! :barscarf:

For future reference when fucked by the hangover, try my patented "Cure or Kill" remedy;

1. Place one can of beer in the freezer for about 20 to 30 minutes (this depends on your freezer) basically you want the beer freezing fucking ice cold but not quite Slush Puppy frozen.

2. Neck said can in at most 4 or 5 big fuck off sized gulps.

3. Post your thanks to me on here.

Instant cure. Works every time for me. 8) 8)

Disclaimer: this only works if you can keep it in. If you puke it up you will be fucked for the day. :lol: :wink:
Thxs db ill give it a try nxt time
up the reds :barscarf:

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Brightonnxtround
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Re: Up with the lark

Post by Brightonnxtround »

That's a first had to feed my charm of goldfinches they were prity insistent
And looks like matin mcguinness has died not sure I know how I feel about that ...

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Brightonnxtround
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Re: Up with the lark

Post by Brightonnxtround »

Miserable miserable morning looks like the attacker in Westminster last night was a lone wolf how the hell do you protect yourself against that !!!!

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flash gunner
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Re: Up with the lark

Post by flash gunner »

Brightonnxtround wrote:Miserable miserable morning looks like the attacker in Westminster last night was a lone wolf how the hell do you protect yourself against that !!!!
You cant mate. Nothing sophisticated just a bloke with a car and a knife

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Re: Up with the lark

Post by DB10GOONER »

flash gunner wrote:
Brightonnxtround wrote:Miserable miserable morning looks like the attacker in Westminster last night was a lone wolf how the hell do you protect yourself against that !!!!
You cant mate. Nothing sophisticated just a bloke with a car and a knife
That's it, nothing we really can do. Just be alert and aware of your surroundings in public places is about all. Look out for unusual behaviour, unattended packages, sudden disturbances.

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Rugby Gooner
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Re: Up with the lark

Post by Rugby Gooner »

DB10GOONER wrote:
flash gunner wrote:
Brightonnxtround wrote:Miserable miserable morning looks like the attacker in Westminster last night was a lone wolf how the hell do you protect yourself against that !!!!
You cant mate. Nothing sophisticated just a bloke with a car and a knife
That's it, nothing we really can do. Just be alert and aware of your surroundings in public places is about all. Look out for unusual behaviour, unattended packages, sudden disturbances.
A few years ago I was in the North Bank upper at the end of a row.
I spotted a large holdall that was unattended,so quietly asked those around me if anyone owned it.They all said no.
At this point I motioned to a steward,who was down at the front of the tier,to come up,which he did.
I pointed out the holdall to him,and explained that nobody around claimed ownership of it.
You know what he did?
Picked it up and shook it. :shock: :banghead:
Luckily nothing happened,and about 30 seconds later a bloke returned,with a Coke and a Hotdog,and asked why "we were messing around with his bag." :banghead:

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DB10GOONER
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Re: Up with the lark

Post by DB10GOONER »

Rugby Gooner wrote:
DB10GOONER wrote:
flash gunner wrote:
Brightonnxtround wrote:Miserable miserable morning looks like the attacker in Westminster last night was a lone wolf how the hell do you protect yourself against that !!!!
You cant mate. Nothing sophisticated just a bloke with a car and a knife
That's it, nothing we really can do. Just be alert and aware of your surroundings in public places is about all. Look out for unusual behaviour, unattended packages, sudden disturbances.
A few years ago I was in the North Bank upper at the end of a row.
I spotted a large holdall that was unattended,so quietly asked those around me if anyone owned it.They all said no.
At this point I motioned to a steward,who was down at the front of the tier,to come up,which he did.
I pointed out the holdall to him,and explained that nobody around claimed ownership of it.
You know what he did?
Picked it up and shook it. :shock: :banghead:
Luckily nothing happened,and about 30 seconds later a bloke returned,with a Coke and a Hotdog,and asked why "we were messing around with his bag." :banghead:
:lol: :lol:

Fucking hell, the training really kicked in for that guy huh? "This might be a bomb. Ok. I'm shaking it to check!". :roll: :oops: :lol:

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DB10GOONER
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Re: Up with the lark

Post by DB10GOONER »

Rugby Gooner wrote:
DB10GOONER wrote:
flash gunner wrote:
Brightonnxtround wrote:Miserable miserable morning looks like the attacker in Westminster last night was a lone wolf how the hell do you protect yourself against that !!!!
You cant mate. Nothing sophisticated just a bloke with a car and a knife
That's it, nothing we really can do. Just be alert and aware of your surroundings in public places is about all. Look out for unusual behaviour, unattended packages, sudden disturbances.
A few years ago I was in the North Bank upper at the end of a row.
I spotted a large holdall that was unattended,so quietly asked those around me if anyone owned it.They all said no.
At this point I motioned to a steward,who was down at the front of the tier,to come up,which he did.
I pointed out the holdall to him,and explained that nobody around claimed ownership of it.
You know what he did?
Picked it up and shook it. :shock: :banghead:
Luckily nothing happened,and about 30 seconds later a bloke returned,with a Coke and a Hotdog,and asked why "we were messing around with his bag." :banghead:
Had a weird and unnerving incident on a commuter train a few years ago. Was standing by the doors in a crowded carriage and there was one of those "world traveler" arseholes with a big rucksack and acoustic guitar and Dreads in his hair (he was white) and looked like showering was a low low priority for him :roll: .

Anyway dickhead suddenly put down the rucksack and guitar and just pushed his way quite quickly out of the carriage. Every fucker stood there, glancing at the rucksack, at each other, at the rucksack... tension and nerves were obviously growing quite quickly... then dickhead pushes his way back into the carriage and picks up the rucksack and gets off at the next stop. Now obviously he only went for a piss :lol: but I have to admit it was seriously unnerving at the time. :|

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Re: Up with the lark

Post by LeftfootlegendGooner »

DB10GOONER wrote:
Rugby Gooner wrote:
DB10GOONER wrote:
flash gunner wrote:
Brightonnxtround wrote:Miserable miserable morning looks like the attacker in Westminster last night was a lone wolf how the hell do you protect yourself against that !!!!
You cant mate. Nothing sophisticated just a bloke with a car and a knife
That's it, nothing we really can do. Just be alert and aware of your surroundings in public places is about all. Look out for unusual behaviour, unattended packages, sudden disturbances.
A few years ago I was in the North Bank upper at the end of a row.
I spotted a large holdall that was unattended,so quietly asked those around me if anyone owned it.They all said no.
At this point I motioned to a steward,who was down at the front of the tier,to come up,which he did.
I pointed out the holdall to him,and explained that nobody around claimed ownership of it.
You know what he did?
Picked it up and shook it. :shock: :banghead:
Luckily nothing happened,and about 30 seconds later a bloke returned,with a Coke and a Hotdog,and asked why "we were messing around with his bag." :banghead:
:lol: :lol:

Fucking hell, the training really kicked in for that guy huh? "This might be a bomb. Ok. I'm shaking it to check!". :roll: :oops: :lol:
:lol:

OK This is a true story, I work with cctv systems, a local post office rang me and asked if I would download some footage of an individual, as it was only up the road I was there in about 15 minutes, I walked in and went behind the counter and said to the owner (who I have known for years) and asked what she wanted me to download.

She said a guy had come in and dropped off a parcel for delivery and that he said it contained a jigsaw, BUT IT HAD STARTED TICKING!!!!!

I said "Pardon", she said "its there, listen"

My reply was "fuckin hell" followed by a slight sweaty feel.

She then said "it's ok I've rang the police but the nearest bomb squad is half hour away"

It was such a surreal moment and I did question her as to why they didn't ring me after the police had dealt with it but she said she didn't really consider this, and I thought she liked me :shock:

Anyhow her husband then picked the parcel up (and that's when I really started to sweat) and put it outside in a glass phone box and put a small tin bin on top of it :lol:

In due course the police turned up and put one of the small cameras inside and there was a jigsaw in there with a child's clock which I'm guessing the guy who sent it for delivery thought was unwound but after the postie put it down (thrown it more likely as is their want) must have got it going again.

After all was done she said "what do I owe you" my reply was "about five years of my life" but I settled for a few bottles of wine which if I'm honest I needed there and then. :lol:

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DB10GOONER
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Re: Up with the lark

Post by DB10GOONER »

LeftfootlegendGooner wrote:
DB10GOONER wrote:
Rugby Gooner wrote:
DB10GOONER wrote:
flash gunner wrote:
You cant mate. Nothing sophisticated just a bloke with a car and a knife
That's it, nothing we really can do. Just be alert and aware of your surroundings in public places is about all. Look out for unusual behaviour, unattended packages, sudden disturbances.
A few years ago I was in the North Bank upper at the end of a row.
I spotted a large holdall that was unattended,so quietly asked those around me if anyone owned it.They all said no.
At this point I motioned to a steward,who was down at the front of the tier,to come up,which he did.
I pointed out the holdall to him,and explained that nobody around claimed ownership of it.
You know what he did?
Picked it up and shook it. :shock: :banghead:
Luckily nothing happened,and about 30 seconds later a bloke returned,with a Coke and a Hotdog,and asked why "we were messing around with his bag." :banghead:
:lol: :lol:

Fucking hell, the training really kicked in for that guy huh? "This might be a bomb. Ok. I'm shaking it to check!". :roll: :oops: :lol:
:lol:

I walked in and went behind the counter and said to the owner (who I have known for years) and asked what she wanted me to download.

My reply was "fuckin hell" followed by a slight sweaty feel.

and I thought she liked me :shock:

her husband
You see the problem there? :lol: :wink:

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