help please

collins · Post by **collins** » Mon Jun 11, 2007 12:42 pm

there is this bloke at work who wont stop taunting me about his "club" signing greedy little cashley

what can i do short of beeting him up?

Please help ideas wanted

exiled in notts · Post by **exiled in notts** » Mon Jun 11, 2007 1:14 pm

You could try telling him they got a greedy little mercenary who compares his privileged lifestyle with salvery while we got Gallas and some cash.

Or...

...Oh yeah, they're a bunch of scumbags with no history or class and a fanbase composed solely of glory seekers and BNP supporters.

Don't let this stop you beating him up if you absolutely have to though.

Post by **T.S** » Mon Jun 11, 2007 1:18 pm

I condone beating him up. In fact, I encourage it. Still, if you don't want to do that, call him a few expletives and then ask him how many times Chelsea have won the league.

Next, inform him that in Abramovich's first summer, he spent as much as Arsene Wenger has spent at Arsenal in all of his seasons combined - and yet Chelsea still can't buy the class and history that we have, and will always have.

Then, put him in a round room and tell him to find the corner.

Try shagging his wife, too.

Galasso · Post by **Galasso** » Mon Jun 11, 2007 1:29 pm

Take his bottle and dummy away, sleep with his mum and...beat him up.

Alternatively, you need to make a huge pile of money so that you can:

a. Buy-out and destroy Chelsea

or

b. Buy out your company and sack the c**t

Post by **T.S** » Mon Jun 11, 2007 1:32 pm

Accuse him of sexual harassment!!!

There must be some fellow Gooners in your office who would back you up...

Post by **DB10GOONER** » Mon Jun 11, 2007 1:39 pm

I never agree with beating up other football fans as I am against all hooligan arseholes so I would.... aah b*llocks to it all - beat the sh*t outa him, the chav crunt. He ain't a real fan. None of them are.

Three titles in their entire history. And they bought two of them. The gimps.

Galasso · Post by **Galasso** » Mon Jun 11, 2007 1:51 pm

Tell him that his c**t of a club is the only institution in England to have made a group of pensioners unpopular.

And if you haven't already beaten the shit out of him, ask him if he was in Cardiff in 2002. The Arsenal 2 - Pre-Russian cocksuckers 0.

Post by **T.S** » Mon Jun 11, 2007 1:59 pm

Kindly remind him that his mum is a whore, also.

Post by **I Hate Hleb** » Mon Jun 11, 2007 2:02 pm

COLLINS,

You ask: "what can i do short of beeting him up?"

I say: You can use the aforementioned beet (or any other root vegetable) and shove it up his Cashley!

Alternatively, ask him if he'd like to have his Willy back - after you have chopped it off with a machete first!!

If that doesn't work, just laugh at him. No need to say anything - just laugh. Nothing infuriates more than wondering why someone is laughing at you (just ask Baptista)

Personally, I prefer either of the first two options. You are much more likely to get his attention that way!!

Post by **T.S** » Mon Jun 11, 2007 2:11 pm

Quite the homoerotic reply there, Mr. I.H. Hleb

exiled in notts · Post by **exiled in notts** » Mon Jun 11, 2007 2:23 pm

Collins - Nearly forgot. You could also point out that Cashley's career has hardly hit new heights since leaving the Arsenal. A curse that seems to have afflicted a number of players who moved on to supposedly bigger and better things (Le Sulk, Petit, Overmars, Vieira). Take note Thierry and Cesc and others, if what the papers are saying has even a shred of truth.

Cashley would've been better off going to the Dunfootballin' Twilight Home for Retired Gooners down at Fratton Park.

Galasso · Post by **Galasso** » Mon Jun 11, 2007 2:25 pm

I can definitely see the makings of a new tarantino movie here. Although confining the suffering to a Chelsea fan seems selfish and wrong.

Post by **I Hate Hleb** » Mon Jun 11, 2007 2:45 pm

Galasso wrote:I can definitely see the makings of a new tarantino movie here. Although confining the suffering to a Chelsea fan seems selfish and wrong.

O.k. then. We can include any Spuds, Mancs, Hammers and Mickey Mousers to the list.

However, them Chavs do deserve special treatment all of their own for being such Johnny-come-lately know it alls, so can we reserve the 'Willy' treatment/punishment I suggested earlier for them only? Please?

Post by **T.S** » Mon Jun 11, 2007 2:46 pm

exiled in notts wrote:Collins - Nearly forgot. You could also point out that Cashley's career has hardly hit new heights since leaving the Arsenal. A curse that seems to have afflicted a number of players who moved on to supposedly bigger and better things (Le Sulk, Petit, Overmars, Vieira). Take note Thierry and Cesc and others, if what the papers are saying has even a shred of truth.

Cashley would've been better off going to the Dunfootballin' Twilight Home for Retired Gooners down at Fratton Park.

http://www.onlinegooner.com/exclusive/index.php?id=79 - shameless plug

Post by **I Hate Hleb** » Mon Jun 11, 2007 2:51 pm

I wrote earlier: "However, them Chavs do deserve special treatment all of their own for being such Johnny-come-lately know it alls, so can we reserve the 'Willy' treatment/punishment I suggested earlier for them only? Please?"

Come to think of it, I don't suppose it would be too much of an ordeal for most Spurs fans!

(Cutting comedy at its best, I'm sure you'll agree!)

help please

help please

Talking Pricks & Arseholes

Chavs for the Chop!

Foreskin Hell!