The Gooner Forum

For some of you folk this coming weekend will be the time that you are dragged out to the cinema by the missus to watch "Fifty Shades of Grey". If you are unfortunate enough to be among those having to keep her indoors happy then let me extend my sympathy to you in advance.

The book that spawned this film devoted almost 60 percent of it's content to the art of shagging etc. The film does 15 minutes over 2 hours! There is no genitalia, either female or male (sorry about that Flash) on show, and is not as raunchy as either Game of Thrones or Spartacus.

It has been ripped to shreds today by the preview press and critics and is set to be a massive flop (sorry about that too Flash, you can get some pills though).

You'll be going in the hope of seeing some soft porn and the missus getting a bit raunchy on the way home. Sadly you're likely to be badly let down on both counts as you're going to wonder how you can reclaim the worst two hours of your life and she'll have a massive cob on. Get ready to hear how "the book was much better" at least a dozen times before Sunday lunch.

Fortunately Mrs Spuddy is working this weekend and I've been spared the agony. Good luck!

lol good post. just tell your missus that you'll happily tie them to the bed, gag them, and spank them for free without spending money on movie tickets

I'd happily just tie her to the bed for the night so i can watch TV in peace

flash gunner wrote:I'd happily just tie her to the bed for the night so i can watch TV in peace

Amen, no TOWIE NO TEEN MOM 2 NO REALITY FUCKING SHITE BOLLOCKS

BRING BACK ULTIMATE FORCE

BRING BACK FREE BOOBS

BRING BACK SOMETHING MANLY

Rugby thread? Bitch-Lit thread?

Jesus Christ. Can you people please stick to your gay pride website?

DB10GOONER wrote:Rugby thread? Bitch-Lit thread?

Jesus Christ. Can you people please stick to your gay pride website?

Sense a Valentine's thread is not far away.

You are an Arsenal supporter, you should be used to getting spanked every other week!

Rugby Gooner wrote:You are an Arsenal supporter, you should be used to getting spanked every other week!

I wrote a book"10 Shades of Barry" and i can assure you the film i made of it was much superior to the book!!

This is a screenshot of me on my side applying one of the shades

I managed to avoid the whole Harry Potter thing and hope this fad can pass me by too.

People investing their lives in fantasy worlds when their lives are so boring and unfullfiling.

I've decided to spend more time on here

Best review ever

arseofacrow wrote:I managed to avoid the whole Harry Potter thing and hope this fad can pass me by too.

People investing their lives in fantasy worlds when their lives are so boring and unfullfiling.

I've decided to spend more time on here

My lady friend asked me if I'd like to role play one of the scenes from the film.

I was up for it and agreed straight away.

Then she told me she wanted to do the scene where Mr Gray buys the lady a brand new Audi.