There is an elephant.

In this very room.

In the corner of where you are reading this as well.

In the unlikely event you are in the Serengeti, or the elephant enclosure of London Zoo, there probably shouldn’t be elephants in view.

But this one is stomping around.

Looking serenely as he made Mudryk look like he was worth his transfer fee.

Caught in the middle of nowhere.

Not closing down the player. Not closing down the angle, and not protecting his goal.

As useful as a pair of flip flops in a hurricane.

Shame Raya was using flip flops to distribute the ball.

I mourn from Aaron Ramsdale.

I no longer wish to mourn.

I hate criticising Arsenal players.

Like Oddball in Kelly’s Heroes, I dislike negative waves.

Be more Clint Eastwood.

Believe.